Are We Afraid of Birth?

    The chapter I am beginning now considers how Confucianism and Taoist would respond to a set of issues surrounding contemporary practices of birth: abortion, stem cell research, surrogacy, etc.  As I begin, I am struck by an idea: are we, modern Americans (and moderns in other cultural settings), simply afraid of birth?

     The question comes to mind, first, from my brief perusal of books about birth in the US.  One thing that is talked about is the medicalization of birth that has become prevalent in the 20th century.  Earlier, births usually happened in home settings with midwives.  With industrialization and urbanization (and cultural modernization), birthing became more of a hospital thing, overseen by doctors.  Cesarean procedures have become more and more prevalent.  Interestingly, in the 1920s and 1930s in the US, hospital-based births were actually more dangerous, in terms of maternal and child mortality, than home-based births (see: Tina Cassidy, Birth). But the fear of bad outcomes overwhelmed the empirical reality, and people went to hospitals in hopes of avoiding the worst.

     So, we fear birth physically: it can kill mothers or bring miscarriage or still birth, all tragedies.

     But we also fear it socially.  At least at first, before we have experienced it or have had a chance to start raising children, we avoid birth because it might impinge upon the plans we have made for our lives.  We want to go to school, start careers, travel, be free, have fun.  So, we push it off, deciding later in life to have children.  We think we can control it, and we can to some degree, but there is always that possibility of the loss of control, the appearance of birth when we do not want it in our lives. 

       This social fear is evident in some of the responses to the new Pew poll on marriage and parenthood.  Consider these two statements from the executive summary:

• Public Concern over the Delinking of Marriage and Parenthood. Adults of all ages consider unwed parenting to be a big problem for society. At the same time, however, just four-in-ten (41%) say that children are very important to a successful marriage, compared with 65% of the public who felt this way as recently as 1990.

• Children Still Vital to Adult Happiness. Children may be perceived as less central to marriage, but they are as important as ever to their parents. As a source of adult happiness and fulfillment, children occupy a pedestal matched only by spouses and situated well above that of jobs, career, friends, hobbies and other relatives.      

 So, respondents believe you do not need children to have a happy marriage but that when you actually have children they are experienced as a source of great joy and happiness.  To me, this suggests that children as seen by many as something of an intrusion into an otherwise good life, until, of course, they actually come into your life, then they are a marvel.  It is that first attitude that makes me wonder: is is a kind of social fear?  A desire not to let the responsibilities of parenthood derail the fun of an extended childhood?

      I raise all of this because I think a modernized Confucianism and Taoism would both counsel us not to fear birth.  For Confucians, we find our own Humanity through the close and loving relationships with forge with others, and none is closer or more loving than those we have with our children.  For Taoists, nothing is more "natural," more in keeping with Way, than human reproduction.  It is fundamental to who and what we are, and we will certainly find our Integrity (Te) there.

      But perhaps I am wrong about this.  So, a question: do we, as a culture and society, fear birth?  Should we?

Comments

[Cloudwalking Owl]

Perhaps people are right to be afraid of births. The biggest reproductive problem we have in the world is massive over-fertility. The USA alone of all modern industrial nations still has a very high birthrate. It is reasonable for people to be afraid when they are in the process of committing collective suicide. Of course, this is not a conscious thought, but perhaps it is something that people feel "beneath the radar" without being able to articulate.

I'm not an expert on Confucianism, but I seem to recall reading some very enlightened ecological statements from Mencius. I also believe that the religion of Daoism (perhaps as opposed to the philosophy) would not be opposed to controlling population growth, and would encourage people to think about the impact of their behaviour on nature. It also strikes me that it would be an act of filial piety towards future generations and the state to limit one's fertility in the present, incredibly dangerous situation.

[Peter]

Perhaps people are right to be afraid of births. The biggest reproductive problem we have in the world is massive over-fertility

This is arguably true in a global sense, but it ignores the fact that fertility in most parts of the developed world is below replacement rate - to the extent that countries such as Japan and Singapore are actively trying to encourage their people to have more babies (with litte success). The Western world is certainly not committing collective suicide through overpopulation.